Posts

Prologue

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I am a fat woman in a thin body. I am a thin woman in a fat body. I am a fat girl in a thin body. I am a thin girl in a fat body. Fat girl, fat woman – Fat woman, thin girl – Thin girl, fat woman – Fat woman, fat girl – Fat girl, thin woman – Thin woman, fat girl – Fat girl, fat woman – Fat woman, fat girl – Fat girl, thin girl – Thin girl, fat girl – Fat girl, fat woman... Around and around I go, Not-so-merry-go-round. Fat is my truth, Consuming above all. Two tales, one body, One body, two tales. Two bodies? Thin narrates a sudden lie, Fat an epic truth, *A Tale of Two Bodies* Another truth: Fat, I am shamed; Thin, I am raw. A bared secret: I turn to fat, In a flash;

Palisades Amusement Park: A Dream Denied (Jennifer Semple Siegel)

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Remember those iconic comic book ads for Palisades Amusement Park?  Even the name was cool. Growing up in the Midwest, I thought that this park must have been heaven on earth. I mean, how cool would it to be able to ride a Ferris wheel on the edge of a cliff?
In fact, I was a bit aggrieved that I lived too far away. The amusement park might as well have been on the moon. Comic books filled with ads for free admission I could never use – Even back in the early 1960’s, our culture was East- or West-coast centric, the Midwest a lonely outpost for farmers and hayseeds. Boo, hoo. Once, I sent away for a booklet that offered names, addresses, and photos of potential pen pals (I wasn’t in it – Hell, no!). I flipped through it until I found a boy from New Jersey. His name was Lawrence Miller; he lived over the border from Philly – Cherry Hill, I believe. South Jersey. Palisades Park was in North Jersey (even back then, my grasp of basic geography was sketchy). In a nerdy way, Lawrence was kind of cute, lik…

Intermittent Fasting: Yea or Nay?

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After the holidays, it was time to get serious. My weight was going up – fast. For two years, WW had worked well for me, but then it just stopped working – no matter how much I stuck to the program, my weight just wouldn’t budge. The least deviation from program resulted in weight gain. I was discouraged. To add insult: last summer, while on vacation, I gained 11 pounds in two weeks. Granted, I wasn’t sticking to program very well, but that amount of gain seemed excessive – like 10,000 calories-a-day gain. I knew that couldn’t be right. I was eating nowhere near that number. After vacation, I could not shake that weight. Here and there, I would lose a pound or two, but then I would eat something high calorie and high fat, and the weight would just come back – and then some. I had my thyroid checked – Normal. So I just kind of gave up. Hell. I gave up. Then, the holidays – the bane of any program, weight-loss or even maintenance. Thanksgiving and the Christmas holidays were especially…

Play Like a Kid!

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If we adults played like very young children, we would probably never get fat, certainly not obese. If we approached physical activity like children do – that is, before the lure of technology and the opposite sex kicks in – we would probably never give up moving our bodies. We would always be in tip-top shape. We would never get up in the morning and groan about having to hit the gym or the great outdoors. We would just jump into our play clothes and shoes and hit the pavement. No drama. It’s all about attitude: children embrace activity – they enjoy playing outside and exploring their surroundings and making new friends. As a child, I wasn’t especially adept at or fond of organized sports – I was never much of a rule lover – but I did spend a lot of time outside, roaming the neighborhood and finding other kids to play with: the Stanislavs, the Crannys, the Behrens, the Bolands, the Hawkins, among others. Freestyling kids don’t select their friends because of common interests and in…

How to Build a Fat Body (For Slim People Only)

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“Fools are my theme, let satire be my song.” – Lord Byron ______________________________________
Today, I am going to teach you how to build a fat body:
1. Eat whatever you want and in any quantity. Eat until your gut bulges. Dump a load of greasy snacks down your gullet, especially close to bedtime so that the middle of the night morphs into a cauldron of acid indigestion and acid reflux. What fun! 2. Skip meals. Better yet, starve all day, and eat only one large meal a day, and that should be at night, the later the better, lasting until you hit the sheets. Be sure to add some sweet and salty snacks to your food dump. 3. Never exercise. Walk only when you must, for example, shuffling to the fridge or waddling from your car to your favorite fast food place. Better yet, use the drive-through. 4. Make sure that you’re sleep deprived. Four hours a night is quite enough, but I’m sure that you could function with a lot less. Soldier on! Man up! 5. Eat nothing but junk food. The higher the fat …

WW Freestyle Revisited

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After months and months at a standstill, WW Freestyle has started working for me again. This is not a random occurrence, for I have made two significant changes:
(1) I have re-evaluated how Freestyle can work for me specifically. For example, I have accepted the fact that some zero foods cannot be zero points for me, such as corn. I have gone back to counting it. Also, I am very careful about how much I use as 0-points food. After three small servings of fruit, I now start counting any additional fruits. I weigh all fish, chicken and beef and limit them to 2-3 ounces at lunch and 4-5 ounces at dinner, less if it’s beef, salmon (or any high fat fish), or ham, then it’s no more than 2/4. I count points for additional ounces of fish and chicken (Except steamed shrimp – I will eat up to six ounces without counting points). Like many people prone to gaining weight, I have never had a problem with overeating protein, so this was not a difficult change. In fact, I tend to eat too little protein, so…

Mini Review: Built Bars and Quest Bars

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As someone who must constantly monitor weight, I am always looking for tasty products that can help me to lose and maintain a healthy weight. I have discovered two protein Bars that I like: Built Barsand Quest BarsBuilt Bars: Of the two, I prefer Built Bars, which has a better flavor overall and a real dark chocolate coating. Stats: 3 WW points; 110 calories; 15 grams of protein; 4 grams of fat (2.5 saturated); 6 grams of fiber; 4 grams added sugar (just enough to offer satisfaction for my enormous sweet tooth). Pros: a rich flavor, a substantial size, lower calories and overall fat, and the same stats for all flavors across the board. The bar tastes like a candy bar, a definite plus! I feel full after eating a Built Bar (with a salad or fruit). Built Bars can be a meal replacement or a snack. For consumers with nut allergies: no nuts and manufactured in a nut-free facility. Cons: Some consumers may not like the gel-nougat filling, and the chocolate coating melts quickly, so it’s not a …